Pupukahi i holomua.

(unite to move forward)

With a sunburnt nose and about 1,000 new freckles, I returned from a family vacay to Maui, Hawaii. During our week on the island of the valley, my adventuring spirit delighted in ATVing all over a red dirt mountain, swimming with a sea turtle friend, and speeding through the air on a zipline. I owe my daily enjoyment of the sunrise to the time difference and I discovered that I love macadamia nuts.

It was a battle for me to go on this trip... I was nervous about requesting vacation time so soon after taking three weekends off for Africa. What I hadn't anticipated was my struggle with the sharp contrast of the luxury and indulgence of a vacation in Hawaii with the need and poverty I saw in Africa last month. Why do we get to splurge on ourselves for an entire week when there are people who can't afford their basic necessities for a day?

It's easy for numbers and statistics regarding the poor and needy to seem cold and distant. Orphans are easier to ignore before you know their names. They are easier to ignore before you see their faces. It is easier to pretend they're not real before you hold them in your arms. But once you do, everything changes.

[Radical. David Platt]

It's a question that, unfortunately, I don't know the answer to. I don't know if it's okay for us to spend frivolously instead of using the resources we have to meet others' need. I honestly don't know if it was okay for me to be in Hawaii.

My inner tension was coupled with tension from some very un-fun family dynamics during the trip. However, I believe there is a certain beauty in allowing our loved ones to see us at our weakest. To not hide the tears. To acknowledge the hurt. Though there was pain, revealing those wounds gives us the opportunity to heal them. To learn how to not hurt each other. To be aware of the way we love each other.

Color of the day: pacific blue. the color of the warm island water, the color of a water that washes away hurt, tear, and questions; of a water that hopefully gives us clarity and healing.

Chikmunks and T-shirts

So I rolled up to the Starbucks drive-through this morning, 6:15 a.m. Despite the fact that I wake up at 2:45 a.m. three times a week for work, I reserve the right to complain about waking up at 5:00 a.m. on a Sunday.

Tall coffee with classic sweetener and a splash of whole milk please, and a reduced-fat turkey bacon sandwich (ordered for the taste, not the calories).

But when I pull up to the window to receive my treats, it is not the cheerful girl who took my order, but a dashing young man. As we traded money for food, I blushed as I gave him what I felt was my cutest, most confident smile.

As I pulled away, I looked in my mirror to see exactly what "my cutest, most confident smile" looked like. No joke, I looked like a freakin' chikmunk, which by the way, is how I pronounce it. Actually, I used to call them "chick-a-munks." I also said "arach-a-nids" and "Chuck-a-Norris." I'm not sure why I added that extra syllable, but I like it, even now.

Yet I digress (from the story that was pointless in the first place). Where was I? Oh, who knows.

Color of the day: Pacific Blue. The main (and only) reason for this is because I got a free t-shirt at church tonight of this color and I'm pretty stoked. Make that absolutely and totally excited. I'm wearing it right now, in fact. Are these posts getting more and more irrelevant? Indeed. I'll try to do better. Maybe.